yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
