mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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