can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
