He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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