this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
