carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
It's official drugs can't kill me
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.