I can't watch pbs sober anymore
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.