I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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