Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK