Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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