DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
