Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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