I skipped work to stalk him.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
