She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
