i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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