so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
