Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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