No awkward lesbian experiences without me
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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