He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
