We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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