Three words: puerto rican gang bang
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
