honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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