thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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