I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring money and cleavage
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize