I'm drive I can fine osifer
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
