So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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