But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
