I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
