I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
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there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize