So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize