can we get nightvision for the apartment?
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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