His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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