Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
