Me too!
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
no you cant smoke seaweed
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
