Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
