Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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