Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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