Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
