i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize