laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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