my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
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just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
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Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter