I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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