i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
