butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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