so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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