He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
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I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
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Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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