Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize