do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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