I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize