I CAN MOONWALK!
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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