weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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