Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
